Sorry I've been away for a bit. Life has a bit nuts - I'll give you a hint. This was my view at 3:03 AM just over three weeks ago:
Needless to say, it kind of threw a wrench into my life. I had never known before what it was like to be without a home. For several minutes I stood, just watching the apartment I'd worked hard for get closer and closer to being consumed by the flames.
In that moment I had to face the possibility that everything I had gathered would be gone. A rather wordy way to say that I was scared shitless.
I had never had to face the possibility that at the end of the day I would not have shelter over my head. That kind of realization changed me to the core.
It was remarkable how fast news of the fire spread. I hadn't even begun texting people to let them know I was okay when coworkers who had seen the fire on the news and started sending me messages. Was I okay; did I need anything; was that my building? Thank goodness I had grabbed my phone in my haste to leave.
My mother picked up the phone within the first few rings. She and my father would be down soon. All the while Patrick - who I'd called first - waited with me. The 24 hour doughnut shop down the street from my apartment was a buzz of activity that morning. Patrick and I grabbed some doughnuts and waited there for my parents to arrive. Around us all the regulars chirped on and on about the fire. Speculation flew through the air as several of the tenants of my old apartment wandered in and out. One even slept in the far corner.
All the while friends and family were sending me messages, asking what I needed. I could feel their love and support from many miles away, across the country. Honestly, I'm not sure how I would have made it through that day without all of their support and love.
The hours passed and the days went by. People came out of the woodwork to support me and help me out. I eventually did get into my old apartment. It was unreal going in after all that had happened - and yet most everything was the same as I'd left it. Just wet. Dishes were in the sink, waiting to be washed. DVDs were in a pile by the doors to my deck - where I had set them to be organized. Several board games sat at my kitchen table, never to be played again. One that I had just gotten, Onirim, had popped out of its box - the cards in it had gotten so waterlogged that they'd expanded.
Over two days several friends, family members, and I put my old belongings that we thought we could save into plastic totes to be carried to my new apartment. I'm still amazed just how much we were able to salvage. It's been a long process sorting through the old stuff, washing old clothes and blankets, trying to get the smell of smoke off of everything, but it's coming along. I'll get back to blogging regularly, but I beg your forgiveness for being silent. I've had a few other things on my mind.
Much love to you, my friend. Remember that everything surrounding you is just stuff in this physical world we inhabit. It's the people and the connections you make that matter. They'll still be there when you have nothing else to hold you up.
